Beowulf Rant
Nov. 21st, 2007 04:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hertinknessI am a geek. Therefore, I am probably one of the... well, one... people in high school that enjoyed reading Beowulf.
I mean, it was pretty cool for someone with an imagination who was able to look past all the old language and bits the monks added in. You had the big hero, the big monster (which was nasty), and the big monster's even nastier momma, who as I understand looked something like a cross between an octopus and a city bus. And the hero kicked the asses of the monsters and came back to a party given by a Viking queen. With much more imagery.
And then we get this Beowulf movie...
First off, Grendel's mom? Not hot. Octopus and city bus not hot. She didn't have feet molded into stilleto heels either (well maybe she did, but they'd have been covered by the chitin). Beowulf would not have wanted to do her. And where did they dig up these actors, SciFi Original Movie Casting rejects?
I am not going to this. I am that much dumber for having seen the previews. I think I can safely say that this movie is going to look like a cross between an octopus and a city bus.
I mean, it was pretty cool for someone with an imagination who was able to look past all the old language and bits the monks added in. You had the big hero, the big monster (which was nasty), and the big monster's even nastier momma, who as I understand looked something like a cross between an octopus and a city bus. And the hero kicked the asses of the monsters and came back to a party given by a Viking queen. With much more imagery.
And then we get this Beowulf movie...
First off, Grendel's mom? Not hot. Octopus and city bus not hot. She didn't have feet molded into stilleto heels either (well maybe she did, but they'd have been covered by the chitin). Beowulf would not have wanted to do her. And where did they dig up these actors, SciFi Original Movie Casting rejects?
I am not going to this. I am that much dumber for having seen the previews. I think I can safely say that this movie is going to look like a cross between an octopus and a city bus.
